Is Money Guilt Holding You Back?

During the recent opening of Financial Freedom University, I received emails and Facebook questions asking me “If you’re so wealthy and you really care about helping others, why aren’t you giving this programme away for free?”.  

I love this question and its close cousin “Ann, how can I feel comfortable investing and creating wealth when there are millions of people starving in the world?” because they stem from the same root – lack of self-worth and guilt – neither of which are useful to you or the world.

People struggle with these two wealth issues on a daily basis and they held me back for years too. Not only held me back from creating my own wealth but actually held me back from giving and receiving massive value and contributing to make the world a better place.

Let’s take the first question which is all about self-worth and value.

Money is just a mechanism for us to exchange value. For value to be passed from one to another there has to be an exchange. There has to be a giver of value and a receiver of value and the money exchange is an acknowledgment of the value being transferred.

When one party in the exchange believes they should receive the value without any exchange they may get the “goods”, but they will never receive the value. In the same way, if the giver does not fully value what they are giving, by ensuring that an aligned value exchange occurs, they also block the value being transferred.

I see many amazing creatives, healers and spiritual teachers blocking the flow of the value they can and should be bringing into the world by giving their gifts away for free or basically free and feeling “guilty” about receiving value back. By doing this they negate the value exchange and therefore block the receiver from experiencing the value. Effectively withholding the value, they are meant to bring into the world.

Where there is a value exchange there is actually an exchange of energy – the more value exchanged the greater the energy and since money is then a mechanism of energy exchange you see that it all comes down to Newton’s Third Law of Motion.

“For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.”

If you are providing value (energy), you must receive an equal amount of value (energy) back. If you don’t allow the energy exchange to occur you are diminishing the value of what you are exchanging.

Many of us have been taught that being humble, poor, to suffer, or to accept whatever you get without questioning and just be grateful for your lot is somehow virtuous. But it’s a false belief that goes against the laws of nature. This belief states that you should provide as much value as possible, i.e. send out vast amounts of energy, and get nothing in return. Not only should you not expect the energy to come back, but to go without it is actually something to strive for.

This belief diminishes value and actually magnifies and contributes to poverty and lack which brings us to the aspect of money guilt.

Recognising the financial injustices of our current world reality, the poverty of many in the face of the few who have so much, is not a reason to reject money. If you consciously, or unconsciously block the exchange of value so as to not feel “guilty” about having money, you are simply lining yourself up on the side of the victim and perpetuating the polarity of the haves and the have-nots.

It is easy to fall into moral or “spiritual” righteousness and use this as an excuse to justify a reality of lack. But this is neither useful nor productive, and at a level I could go so far as to say it is selfish because as you’ve seen above, in order to perpetuate lack you must hold back value.

Poverty is not useful. 

Poverty is different from conscious abstinence – a life which some people, like Mother Teresa, consciously choose as part of their spiritual journey. For many people living in lack is a question of preferring to be on the side of the underdog – choosing the moral superiority of the victim.

Money is power in this world. If you wish to change things and make the world a better place, you are more likely to have success if you have money than if you do not. Therefore, to condemn wealth is an abdication of your power and the value you are meant to contribute to this world.

Feeling guilty about having money blocks the flow of value and magnifies lack. Holding back your value because you don’t feel worthy of receiving doesn’t serving the world.

Believing you must receive something without a value exchange is diminishing your worth and blocking the flow of value to you.

The best way to abolish any money guilt it to ensure you give and receive maximum value from the money exchange.

Reflect on the income that has flowed into your life in the past money and connect to the value you provided for that income. Go through your expenses and consciously ask yourself what value you received from every money exchange and how that exchange supported you.

As you look at your utility bill, think about what that money exchange gave you, think about how the energy enabled you to heat your home in the winter, cook your food, provided you with clean water to drink. Remember how the telephone bill enabled you to connect with those you love. Now if you come to an expense where you just can’t find any real value – you’ve just found an expense to clear from your life.

How cool is that. When you are able to go through all your expenses and feel real value from each money exchange and link that to support you have received to live a full, rich life – then you know you’re mastering this thing called money.

I’d love to know your thoughts on this topic and what you discovered going through your expenses. Let me know by dropping me an email on [email protected].